| Lesbian row | You too laides. | I am your host, TV's Craig Ferguson | It's a great day for America everybody | Do we have a picture of ____? |
| What did we learn on the show tonight, Craig? | Wikipedia | I love Maryland. I got crabs there once. | In your pants | Grow a pair of testicles |
| TARDIS | Ooh-la-la | CRAIG FERGUSON BINGO (free square) | Do we have a picture of Paul McCartney? | Oprah |
| I look forward to your letters. | Sex robot | What time is it Geoffrey Peterson? | One is a ____ and the other is a ____. | Craiky-Dingo |
| Whose that at the door? | Awkward pause or mouth organ? | Me-ow! | Kangaroo testicles | Sex party! |